A Job Search Dating Analogy One Womans Quest on Both Fronts - Hire Imaging

A Job Search Dating Analogy One Woman’s Quest on Both Fronts - Hire Imaging I recently had the joy of working with Lana, a client in her thirties, who came to me with dual goals. “I’m searching for two fitsâ€"my soul mate and my soul job,” she said. The job search parallels the search for a fulfilling personal relationship. Whether you’re dating or or in a job search,   you’re reviewing potential matches, trying to simultaneously show your value while evaluating them at the same timeâ€"and trying to be diplomatic about the whole thing. Here are some examples from Lana: Job Search Dating: There are many fish in the sea, so get back out there. 1. Lana felt rejection on both the job and personal fronts. Her boyfriend of six months had broken it off. Her employer of four years had eliminated her position. She was feeling wounded. Having been in a serious car accident as a teenager resulting in a fractured jaw and broken hip, she was told to get back in the car and drive. She applied this story to her current situation. Yes, she was banged up and bruised, shaken that the world could be right again. Instead of retreating, she told many people that she was looking for her dream career; and she signed up for a well-known dating site. She discovered that it’s about confidence and that opportunities present themselves when least expected. Job Search Dating: Figure out what you love and need. 2. Lana wanted to find a guy with a sense of purpose, loyalty, and an ability to laugh at himself and life in general. A technology whiz who did not take herself too seriously, she also sought a workplace where the work was valued highly; but the nature of fun at work was equally important. In the social and job search arenas, she did informational interviews all the time. She talked to people online and offlineâ€"a lot. Job Search Dating: Work your magic charm. 3. Lana listened to and practiced positive self talk. She created separate personal and career pitches as to why whoever got her would be lucky. It was not boastful, but it was confident. There was not a trace of anxiety or insecurity. She did not rely on winging it. She was prepared to talk about who she was,   what she liked, what she was good at, and why she was a value. She was also prepared to be an expert listener, focusing conversation on the other person or organization to really hear their pain, their joys and their needs. Job Search Dating: Kiss a lot of frogs but shy away from rebounds. 4. Lana believed in the old adage, “You have to kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince.” She enthusiastically networked. She renewed old connections and made new ones. She went on every interviewâ€"even those she wasn’t excited about. She did not take every job offered her. During our work together there were several job offersâ€"and one “please be my steady” offerâ€"that she evaluated and turned down. They didn’t feel right. Job Search Dating: Be proactive and intense. 5. Lana loved to find antiques. She tackled her soul job-and mate search with the same intensity. She did call them; she did not hound them. She stayed in touch and on good terms. She dripped personality, credibility and a zest for grabbing the brass ring.   She had both her résumé and on-line dating profiles meticulously ready to go. She did her research. She made a good impression. She followed up. She did not waste her energy on going for anything. She was discerning on people and career relationship opportunities. Lana approached her dual search for a meaningful career and relationship with enjoyment, patience and hope. At this writing, she is on her fourth interview with an emerging website design company; and into a three-month relationship with a man she met through a reputable online dating site. The chapters are yet to unfold. But as Lana puts it, “These are major investments. There are always risks, but I can say I have done my due diligence.” Photo:   Don Hankins